Joy

Joy (noun)
1.
a feeling of great pleasure and happiness.
"tears of joy"
synonyms: delight, great pleasure, joyfulness, jubilation, triumph, exultation, rejoicing, happiness, gladness, glee, exhilaration, exuberance, elation, euphoria, bliss, ecstasy, rapture.

Until just recently, I can honestly say that Joy was not something I completely understood. Don't get me wrong, I believe had experienced many moments of tremendous joy.  Coming to know Christ, meeting my husband, my children being born, raising them, my family.  The Joy I am talking about is that which I have found recently.  The Joy of having a loving relationship with God that honors him, and one the doesn't leave me feeling shameful and guilty all the time.  The Joy of having true friends.  The Joy that comes when even in the midst of hardship and fatigue.  I am far from perfect and I don't deserve all I have been blessed with recently.  All I can do is look up and say Thank you.  Thank you Lord for loving me.  Thank you Lord for seeing in me what I cannot.  I believe Joy is about surrendering.  Only when we give it all up and are left with nothing but God can we have true Joy.  Joy that is not dependent on how I feel.  Or how another person has treated me.  Joy that penetrates all of our insecurity.  Joy that can push us past the demons that try to drag us down.  Do I wake up everyday feeling amazing and ready for anything?  Wish I could say yes, but I am not a morning person.  Do I have hope?  You betcha! That hope is what leads me everyday back to Joy.  John 15 says it way better than I ever could.  The fact that God finds Joy in us.  WOW!  And we find our Joy in him.  He says our Joy will be full.  He says He chose us!  That right there brings me Joy.  I don't know about you but I was not always chosen for much.  (think dodge ball)  It was usually like whoever I ended up with.
Even better is that this Joy is not just for me.  It is available to all those who choose to surrender their lives.  It's not about giving something up, but about gaining something that is worth far more than time, or money.  It's about choosing Joy over a life of hopelessness, sorrow and sadness and depression.  I know it's not an easy choice to make, it can take time, prayer, love, friends and even medication if need be.  I don't doubt for one minute that those feeling aren't real, and I know from personal experience how debilitating they can be.  I believe God put doctors, on this earth for a reason and can be necessary and helpful in many situations.  Still I do not believe true and complete healing is possible without God.  True Joy, True Love are gifts from God.

I am no expert.  I can only tell you my perspective.  My Testimony.   I have been blessed in some amazing and unexpected ways recently and where I am today is so different from where I was mentally just a couple years ago.  The one way I can think of to give back is to share what I have been given so that anyone else who is struggling and not feeling Joy can have an opportunity to know that there is hope and good news.

-Grace